My mother in law texted me on Tuesday to see if I was okay and if there was anything she could do for me. It helped just knowing that someone was thinking about me. Oskar refers to it as "the worst day" in Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close. As I've grown older, it seems like the simpler the phrase the more apt it becomes. Fifteen years ago, I was one person and then one morning I was someone else. Someone sadder. Someone without my dad.
Today I am not so sad. I'm not in mourning anymore, even though I still feel grief. I revisit that time and remember what it was like, grateful to not have to relive it. Grateful to have had him at all.
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